女终结者

Meet the Queen of the South Seas. A sexually voracious goddess, she lures young men to her castle and, if they fail to satisfy her demands, kills them faster than you can say 'vagina dentata', leaving her handmaidens to dispose of the castrated remains…
　　One night the Queen meets her match. Her priapic suitor snatches the snake that is the source of her power from between her thighs – causing it to transform into a kris faster than you can say 'blatant symbolism' – and demands that she submit to be his wife as custom apparently dictates. The Queen, however, refuses, swears revenge on the man's ancestors and plunges into the sea to commune with evil…
　　Fast forward 100 or so years and we are introduced to Tanya (Kristianna Loken, er Barbara Anne Constable), an foreign anthropology student researching the legend of the South Seas Queen for her thesis. She charters a boat, goes diving and inexplicably winds up spreadeagled on a giant-size bed in the Queen's undersea lair to then be penetrated by the magic snake-phallus.
　　A few days later – the boat having been lost at sea in a sudden, inexplicable storm – the now-reincarnated Queen/Tanya rises from the sea Aphrodite-like (though that's surely an ethnocentric description; why not Aphrodite rose from the sea Nyai Loro Kidul-like after all he then says in a bout of self-criticism) and disposes of a couple of drunks, thereby equipping herself with tight leathers and some firearms with a seemingly endless supply of ammunition…
　　From here on it's pretty much a rehash of The Terminator as the Sea Queen goes after Erica, a singer who is the descendant of her suitor. Policeman Max (Christopher J. Hart) and his buddies rescue Erica from a disco massacre – cue the "Come with me if you want to live" line – and take her to the station for protection. Naturally Lady Terminator arrives and shoots the place up, but Erica and her new love interest manage to escape. A protracted series of chases, shoot outs and explosions ensue until, finally, Max and co. face off against the now-Zombie like Lady Terminator, complete with eyes shoting laser beams…
　　Is Lady Terminator a good film? Do you really need me to say no?. One laughs at the film rather than with it, whether it be the fashions and hairstyles – snowwashed jeans and mullets anyone? – the ropey effects; the overly intrusive and decidedly cheesy synth score; shoehorning in of Terminator-isms as when the otherwise all-but indestructible Queen removes and then reinserts a damaged eye; or – first among equals – the often ludicrous post-synched dialogue:
　　Max: We have three very dead bodies here…
　　Other cop #1: Very interesting. It says here all three of these guys died with their cocks bitten off. Could be a small animal.
　　Other cop #2: The report says an eel. An eel on dry land? I've heard of the ultimate blow job but, uh, this is too much
　　Max: Obviously done by the same person. But why? What's his or her motive?
　　Other cop #1: How can a human being do this?
　　Other cop #2: Well, very easily. First you take their pants off…
　　(Note that this scene was preceded by other